Fire and Rain: A Wildest Alaska Novel Read online

  “And your grandmother taught you all of that?”

  She sipped her wine, nodded. “My mother’s family mostly, though my father had some Alutiiq ancestry, too.”

  “And Russian, I believe, and a bunch of other stuff.”

  She smiled. “The population of Kodiak Island isn’t that big. When new DNA washes up on the beach…”

  That made Sean laugh. “Justin used to say you were your own United Nations.”

  Sean regretted his words the moment they were out of his mouth, but he was relieved to see the smile still on her face.

  “I like that I can talk with you about him. Some people don’t want me to mention him at all. It’s as if he’s been erased or something.”

  “I’m sorry. They’re probably trying to avoid their own grief.” Sean listened as she told him about a visit from her mother and cousin Mila earlier in the day.

  “I found her stacking his uniforms on the bed. She wanted to know if the Coast Guard recycles them. I lost my temper, yelled at her to put them back, and told her never to touch his stuff again.”

  Sean might have said something stronger. “How did she take that?”

  “Mila did what I asked but was snippy about it. After that, she wanted to leave, which was fine by me. I know my mom felt bad about it, but she let Mila come when I asked her not to. She texted later to apologize. Still, I can’t help but feel guilty.”

  “You get to decide who enters your home, Eden. Your family needs to respect your wishes, especially now. How hard can that be?”

  Maverick was clearly fed up with sitting in his highchair and arched his back, struggling to get down, pesto on his face. “I go dowwwwn!”

  “Hang on, Mavie.” Eden stood, grabbed a washcloth, and cleaned his face and hands before removing his bib and setting him on the floor.

  He took off on his little feet, running nowhere in particular, free at last.

  “Do you think I’m taking too long?” Eden set the washcloth in the sink. “Mila said I shouldn’t wallow in Justin’s death.”

  “Jesus.” Sean muttered under his breath, instinctively reaching to take Eden’s hand. “No, of course not. Justin was your husband. It’s only been three months. You two were crazy about each other. Everyone knows that. Maybe Mila’s forgotten what it’s like to have a husband she loves. He works in Prudhoe Bay you said?”

  Eden nodded. “They only see each other a few months every year. When they’re together, they seem happy, but…”

  “Ignore her.” Sean squeezed Eden’s hand, then let go. “She doesn’t get to decide what you think or how you feel.”

  “Three months doesn’t seem like a long time to me when I thought Justin and I had the rest of our lives to spend together.”

  “It’s not long at all.” Sean could empathize. “I didn’t love Justin the same way you did, obviously, but three months doesn’t feel like a long time to me, either.”

  Eden lifted her gaze to meet Sean’s. “Thanks. You always make me feel better.”

  Her words unleashed a surge of guilt. If he’d done his job that night…

  Sean helped Eden clean up, while Maverick played with blocks on the living room floor. “I should be getting back. I’ve got an early morning tomorrow. I’ll be helping to train the new AETs while my arm and shoulder finish healing.”

  Eden looked up at him, eyes wide. “Oh, gosh. I’m so sorry. I didn’t even ask you how it went today. You had your fitness eval, right?”

  “I passed, but I know I’m not strong enough to operate a hoist line—not yet. I’ll be working in the avionics shop for a while.”

  “Are you okay with that?” She closed the dishwasher, started the cycle.

  “For now.”

  She turned to him, dishtowel in her hands. “Can I ask you a favor?”

  “Of course.”

  “Crab Fest is coming up. As much as I’d rather avoid it, I don’t want Maverick to miss out. He was just a baby last year. This year he’s old enough to go on some of the kiddie rides. Would you mind coming with us and just being there? It’s a lot to ask, I know, and you’ll probably be bored out of your mind. None of my sisters can make it.”

  Kodiak Crab Festival was where Eden and Justin had met.

  He understood. “I’d be happy to. And Eden? When I’m around, you can talk about Justin as much as you like, okay?”

  She smiled. “Thanks. You’re a good friend.”

  May 4

  Sean got up early to take the SWE—the Servicewide Examination. He’d been a little nervous going in, but once he’d gotten into it, time had passed quickly. After he turned in his exam, he made his way to the Avionics Shop, where he’d been working for the past week.

  There’d been an early morning SAR flight for a boat taking on water. The helo had just returned when Sean started his watch.

  James, who’d piloted the helo, walked up to Sean, helmet in his hand. “It’s good to see you back, man.”

  “Dalton Leavitt is about to take paternity leave. I’ll be filling in for him while my arm and shoulder finish healing.”

  “Look at these guys. Is it my imagination, or are the AETs getting younger every year? They look like kids, man.”

  Sean chuckled. “I had the same thought.”

  Spurrier glanced over his shoulder to the helo the new AETs were towing into the shop. “The radio was spotty toward the end of this flight.”

  “Might be electrical noise. Any trouble with any of the displays?”

  Spurrier shook his head. “Just the radio.”

  “We’ll isolate the problem and get it fixed.”

  “I knew you would.” Spurrier headed toward the lockers to change.

  Sean got some tools together and walked over to the new guys. “Listen up. Today, we’re going to get some practice troubleshooting. The pilot reported problems with the radio on this last flight. That can be caused by electrical noise. Who can tell me what electrical noise is?”

  When no one spoke up, Sean chose someone. “Rock, what is electrical noise?”

  Rock shifted uncomfortably, his gaze on the floor. “Electrical noise is when electrical signals get into circuits where they don’t belong.”

  “That’s essentially correct.” Sean gave the group a more detailed explanation and got to work, showing them how to use an oscilloscope.

  He let them find the problem and then helped them fix it, giving everyone a chance to get hands-on experience. When the repair was completed, he inspected their work, answering their questions and stressing how important it was for them to do their jobs perfectly.

  “Samantha, what happens if you make a mistake and the instruments fail in flight?”

  “Someone could get hurt.”

  “Someone could die—not just that helicopter’s flight crew, but also the people they’ve been sent to rescue.”

  Samantha’s expression softened. “You were on the helo that crashed, weren’t you?”

  He felt every gaze on him, waiting for his answer. “I was, and I’m damned lucky to be alive. Two good men died that night. One of them was my best friend. His wife and child will never see him again. You do not want to be the reason a member of a flight crew doesn’t come home to his family.”

  Leavitt, who’d been at a prenatal appointment with his wife, walked up behind Sean. “Listen to Petty Officer McKenna. When that SAR alarm goes off, you need to know you’re sending the flight crew out in an aircraft that’s in perfect working order. If that’s too much responsibility, you don’t belong in avionics.”

  They finished the repairs, and then it was time for lunch.

  Dalton walked with Sean to the galley. “How did they do this morning?”

  “They have a lot to learn. Were we ever this green?”

  “I’m sure I was, but not you, man, not with that degree of yours.”

  The day’s menu was fish and chips with a side salad and brownies. Sean couldn’t help but think of the salad he’d had yesterday and how much tastier it was tha
n iceberg lettuce and shredded carrots. “Have you and your wife ever foraged here?”

  “Foraged?”

  “I ran into Eden Koseki last week. She was out with their son foraging for wild greens and shoots. She invited me over to have dinner and try it out.”

  “No, we’ve never foraged. It sounds gross.” Leavitt poured dressing onto his salad. “Is the stuff she eats really food, or is it just weeds, like dandelions?”

  “I’m not sure there’s a hard line between weeds and edible greens.” Sean tried to remember the names of the greens. “Claytonia. Watermelon berry sprouts. I can’t remember everything she picked. Best salad ever. She made nettle pesto to put on the salmon.”

  “Nettle what?”

  “That’s what I said. She really knows the plants here on the island. She learned from her mother and grandmother, and now she’s teaching Maverick.”

  “How is she doing, really?”

  “Things are hard. She’s doing as well as can be expected.”

  “It really makes you think, doesn’t it?”

  “What do you mean?”

  “Our job. It’s not without danger. It’s not often that something goes wrong, but when it does, the people we love most suffer.”

  An image of Eden’s tear-stained face came to mind, and Sean found himself grateful that he was still single. “That’s true no matter what you do for a living. You could drive a school bus or work in a grocery store and still die on the job.”

  That didn’t seem to reassure Dalton. “I’m not sure it’s a good idea to have a baby now.”

  Sean chuckled. “It’s too late to change your mind.”

  “Tell me about it. They’re inducing Angela tomorrow.”

  “Tomorrow? I hope it goes well.”

  “Thanks.” Dalton talked about the preparations they’d made and the things he still wanted to do before the baby came. “One thing we don’t need is baby clothes. The other Coastie wives gave us so much baby stuff that we won’t have to buy anything until this boy is five.”

  “It’s a boy then?”

  Dalton grinned. “Yeah.”

  “Congratulations, man. That’s great. I’ll be thinking of you both.”

  The conversation shifted to the shop, with Sean bringing Dalton up to date on what they’d done this morning.

  Dalton seemed satisfied. “You’re a natural at this.”

  Sean wasn’t so sure. “Do you ever regret advancing?”

  Dalton looked up from his plate. “Not at all. I like the pay increase. I could probably fly more than I do if I wanted to, but I spent years as part of a flight crew. I’m okay with keeping my feet on the ground these days.”

  They finished eating and walked back to the shop, where Dalton checked the work they’d done this morning. Sean went over each person’s performance, offering tips and suggesting study assignments. He was just ending his shift when the SAR alarm went off.

  “Now put the ready helo online. Now put the ready helo online.”

  Sean shifted gears. “Come on, folks! Let’s move!”

  Chapter Four

  May 28

  Eden parked in the elementary school parking lot. “Are you ready to see the parade, Maverick? There are going to be firetrucks.”

  Sean unbuckled his seatbelt. “You get the toddler, and I’ll get the tactical gear.”

  “Tactical gear? Roger that.” Eden laughed and opened the lift gate so Sean could get the stroller and diaper bag.

  She hopped out and got Maverick out of the back seat. “We’re going to have such a fun time today, Mavie. We’re going to go on rides and play games and get balloons.”

  She hoped it would be a good day. It was hard to imagine being here without Justin, but she didn’t want Maverick to miss out on the fun. More than that, she needed to face this. For as long as she lived, there would be reminders of Justin around every corner, on every beach, and up every trail. She’d told herself she could handle it, especially with Sean there. She trusted him, knew that he understood.

  Sean took out the stroller, locked it in the open position, and plopped the diaper bag in the back. “Your ride is ready, buddy.”

  Eden settled Maverick in the seat and took the handles. “The parade route is just ahead on Mill Bay Road.”

  They walked the short distance, part of a trickle of people heading to see the parade.

  Sean glanced at the sky, light reflecting off his mirrored aviators. “I can’t believe it’s not raining. It always rains for Crab Fest.”

  It was a beautiful, sunny day, but Eden knew that could change. “Don’t jinx it.”

  There was a thin line of spectators on both sides of the road, so it wasn’t hard to find a place to stand.

  Sean glanced around. “I was expecting more of a crowd.”

  Eden laughed. “Everyone else is in the parade.”

  They stood near the end of the parade route, so there was a bit of a wait for the fun to begin. Maverick got restless, tried to climb out.

  “You need to stay in your stroller, Mavie. The firetrucks will be here soon. Watch for them down the street.”

  Maverick leaned over the front of his stroller and craned his little neck. But when he saw nothing, he tried once again to climb out.

  “Want to sit on my shoulders?”

  “Uncle Sean says you can sit on his shoulders.” She lifted Maverick out of the stroller and handed him to Sean.

  Sean settled Maverick on his shoulders, held onto his little legs, and gave him a few playful bounces that made him laugh.

  The sound was a balm to Eden’s soul. She had mostly stayed home since January. And though her two older sisters, Natasha and Maria, had brought their kids to play with Maverick, Eden knew that couldn’t make up for being with a mother who was always sad.

  When at last they heard the first squawk of a siren, Maverick’s eyes went wide, and he pointed. “See, Mommy?”

  “I see! That’s a police car. See the flashing lights?”

  Behind the police vehicle marched the Coast Guard Color Guard, flags fluttering in the breeze, the crowd going respectfully silent as they passed. They were followed by a National Guard personnel carrier. And then, at long last, came the firetrucks.

  Maverick’s eyes went wide, and he pointed, almost bouncing on Sean’s shoulders. “Fietwuck! Fietwuck!”

  “I see it.” Eden smiled at his excitement. “It’s big, isn’t it?”

  Sean grinned. “The kid likes firetrucks.”

  The lead truck gave a blast of its siren, and Maverick laughed with delight.

  Eden loved seeing him happy.

  Then came the island’s many Little League teams, its Scout groups, and its high school sports teams, the roller-skating club, and the local hockey league.

  “You weren’t kidding when you said the rest of the town was in the parade.”

  “We’re just getting started.”

  A motorcycle club, engines revving. Moms with Mowers doing a choreographed routine. A local dog training school with a bunch of pups. A float for the Kodiak Area Native Association with Alutiiq dancers. The Maritime History Museum float. The Kodiak Military Museum float. That guy on the unicycle who came every year.

  Bringing up the rear was the Coast Guard’s big fire engine with the cherry-picker.

  Maverick was beside himself. He pointed. “Fietwuck!”

  Sean turned to Eden. “I can arrange for him to come on base and see the engine. There’s no reason he can’t look at it close up and maybe climb inside.”

  Eden’s heart constricted. “Justin was going to set that up.”

  He’d never gotten the chance.

  “I’ll handle it.”

  “Thanks.” She smiled. “For a man who doesn’t want kids, you’re good with them.”

  With the parade over, they walked back to Eden’s SUV, loaded up, and drove the short distance toward Kodiak Harbor.

  Eden glanced over at Sean. “Now the real fun begins.”

  “Bring it.”
/>
  Sean handed the ride operator the required number of tickets, while Eden settled Maverick in what looked like a tiny cartoon helicopter. There weren’t many rides for tots on the midway, but this one was perfect for Maverick.

  He smiled up at his mother. “I fwy copter! Daddy copter!”

  “That’s right. You’re going to fly in a helicopter like Daddy.” Eden bent over the helicopter to buckle him in. “Don’t stand up, okay, Maverick? Hold on.”

  The operator’s gaze lingered on Eden’s butt as if he were imagining what lay beneath her jeans, and Sean fought the urge to punch the bastard.

  Chill out, man.

  “You fly helicopters?” The operator’s breath reeked of cigarette smoke.

  Sean didn’t feel like explaining his relationship to Eden or Maverick or sharing details of his job. “I’m a Coast Guard flight mech.”

  “Cool, man.”

  Eden finished buckling Maverick into his seat and came to stand on the other side of the fence beside Sean. The operator closed the gate and started the ride.

  The flight of tiny helicopters and airplanes began to spin, carrying precious cargo in slow circles. Maverick let out a squeal of laughter that didn’t stop, his face bright with excitement. The other children were smiling and laughing, too, and Sean found himself wondering what it must be like to be at the age when everything was new.

  Sean hadn’t spent much time around small children, but he had to admit there was nothing like that laughter. “You’ve got a little thrill-seeker on your hands.”

  “Don’t I know it.” Eden took some photos with her phone. “I love seeing him so happy. I try not to cry in front of him. It’s been hard to be the mother he needs.”

  “You’re too hard on yourself. From where I stand, you’re a hero.”

  She looked up at him, doubt in her hazel eyes. “You really mean that?”

  “Hell, yes, I do.”

  “Thanks.”

  Around and around Maverick went, still laughing. But when the ride stopped, his expression fell. “Go!”